Spas & other Subtle Stuff

Imagine a regular Indian guy. On second thoughts, that’s not much of a description to go by.

So imagine a western educated, English language proficient, brand friendly, urban Indian married male, in his mid thirties.

Now imagine this guy as a seeker of spas and assorted luxuries, by profession and not necessarily by inclination and certainly not by financial prowess.

Well, that guy is me. As for what I do professionally, I guess it must derive from the chilling adage – you are only as good as your last show.

The show in question is Spectacular Spas for Men on NDTV GOOD TIMES.
A half hour committed to the idea that decadence is a perfectly legitimate need, as long as the higher purpose of indulgence, is that many splendoured thing - wellness.

But somehow my probing in the lap of luxury towards this haloed state of being, is seldom viewed with the seriousness that the mission merits.

Instead, I often find myself the object of a range of third party emotions (the second party being my wife, who is either plain annoyed with my supposed all-fun-no-work life or just couldn’t be bothered).

The varied emotions I encounter, are usually manifest with attendant physiological contortion – elevated eyebrow accompanied envy, frown supplemented scorn, head shake assisted ridicule, gasping-wide-eyed-disbelief, single shrug indifference and admittedly, on the very rarest of occasions, an open faced “wow”!

I confess, there are a lot worse ways to make a living than by sampling the spa life around the world. But it comes at a price. And no, I’m not talking about all the TV stuff.

In fact, I won’t mention that because let’s face it, no one is interested in my whining about the long days of pre-production, the endless hours of shooting in spa costume (read towel), smiling through the self inflicted torture of re-takes and the scripting and all-night editing that follows.

The biggest price really, is to be robbed of the simple joy of enjoying the luxury there and then, rather than be compelled by job description, to extol the virtues of the pursuit of wellness induced happiness for the audience, without entirely surrendering to the experience.

I realise it’s a subtle point I’m making, so don’t be too hard on yourself if you don’t get it. And don’t get me wrong either - I do believe in what I endorse and present.

It’s all true even if it’s not as glitzy as a cola commercial. But you see, I sample what’s on offer with the studied, judgmental position of a wine taster – all swivelling and spitting and fault finding (though not as dour faced); hardly any swallowing and merry making, even when the fine stuff is all paid for!

And it doesn’t end there. The lethal after effects of exposure to the radiance (if not radiation) of high end hospitality and lodging linger.

End result, it’s impossible to be able to enjoy a cheap thrills, no frills holiday - the only kind I can privately afford. And alas! That’s likely to outlast the recession.

So the next time you see a hapless TV anchor getting a fruity facial or seaweed body wrap, remember it’s just another day at the office.

My Top 3 Spa Experiences:
1) Spa On The Rocks at the Ritz Carlton, Bali
2) Espa Signature Therapy at Victoria Jungfrau Grand Hotel & Spa
3) Oriental Spa at the Mandarin Oriental, Hong Kong

(Courtesy: The Man Magazine)